First Date?

[KIMURA MATSUMI]

Matsumi knew Osamu wasn't necessarily that close to his parents but she was shook by his comment. She startled, wondering if she said something she shouldn't. She knew that a lot of kids at their school felt a lot of pressure on their shoulders, coming mostly from their parents. It was easy to crack under that pressure, especially when it felt impossible to reach the expectations. She had no idea if that was the case for Osamu but his tone didn't make it sound like there was a lot of love between his parents and him. Maybe not a lot of hate either, but a few resentments for sure.

He tried to explain himself. Her breath caught up in her chest. So it was probably the reason why he kept pushing away from her, right? He mentioned clashing with them often. It wasn't something to expect from someone as soft-spoken as Osamu though. Could it be hope that he might stand up for her against them? But if so, why would he be so hesitant to date her? She really didn't know what to make of it. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up a touchy subject," she said in almost a whisper.

It did make her hesitate on what else to say, afraid all of a sudden to say something else that might bother him. Luckily, they had drinks and cakes to give her a way to buy some time and think of something else. And Osamu found something to ask her first. She finished her bite, nodding at the same time. "I would really like it. Ideally also study in Europe. We have very good fashion brands here as well, but this is where all the most famous are from. It would be great to be able to study there." She was glad he recalled this as she didn't think fashion would be something he cared about. She was willing to say as much but also didn't think he would really be all that interested to hear her talk of this for too long. "And you will be studying law, right?"

[FUJIWARA OSAMU]

Osamu rarely let his rebellious side out and very little people knew that he could be like that or argumentative. He tended to agree with whatever others were saying unless it was nonsense then he was willing to fight with his opinions. After all, he was going to become a lawyer, and shouldn’t he know how to win an argument? He would defend people in court and bring all he could to get justice. He didn’t want Matsumi to feel bad about it though, she didn’t know of his situation with his family and he wished she didn’t but if he wanted to be involved with her in any way, she would have to find out.

He shook his head when he saw her feeling bad over it. “You don’t need to feel bad about it, it’s something I have to solve on my own.” He said hoping it would reassure her somehow. He would definitely stand his ground if they were going to lash out on Matsumi. He felt slightly protective towards her when it involve his parents and he didn’t want her to face that. It might be silly but he did care for her after all.

“I understand that it will open horizons for you, you should do it.” He said in an encouraging way. He didn’t want to hold her back on her dreams even if that meant they would be apart for a few years. “Yes, I agreed to study law to keep up with the family business.” He told her. He couldn’t say it was a passion but he thought it was the best way to ease the tension in his family.

[KIMURA MATSUMI]

Osamu was being mature, as always. He was trying to reassure her. That was something to expect with Osamu. It could sometimes be frustrating, when she wanted more than that, but in this case, she tried to nod and not think too much about it. Still, it got her to wonder how strain was his relationship with his parents and how much it played a role in the position they were in right now. Did that mean that doing her best to look good in his parents' eyes would do nothing to help their relationship? Or perhaps she could become a bridge to mend things. It was much to think about. "I understand."

And then he was being mature in an annoying way. There was no trace on his face nor his voice that he might be sad at the idea of her leaving to Europe for who knows how long. He was simply encouraging her in her dream. It should be enough. It was, for sure, a good thing that he wouldn't force her to stay here. But she did wish he could sound even a tiny bit sad at the prospect of them being apart. She took a deep breath, hoping it wasn't too obvious that he didn't win any point here and moved on to his future career plans.

"It is a bit weird to view this as a family business, but I suppose there are law firms. And there are families who pick the same or alike careers, like doctors too." He could also mean that his parents had a business and having a lawyer was alway useful. Having one who was family had to be better, since he would have an even bigger incentive to get things work for them. But she also knew of Osamu's family. Not that it meant anything to her, but she still made sure to know.

[FUJIWARA OSAMU]

Osamu wondered sometimes if his friends even understood his situation with his family. He never was outspoken and when he did speak his mind, it blew up. It did that with his family as they kept pressuring him. He told them straightforwardly that he would follow the steps that his family wanted him to but he also wanted to live his life, have friends, and possibly a girlfriend. He wanted to pick who he wanted to be around and decide for himself. He didn’t think that Hiroki or Yoshihiro would truly understand that. Hideo might, but that guy was another story. He never completely grasped what he thought about as he often focused on the ladies. He nodded when she said that she understood, hopefully, she truly did.

It did hurt, the idea that she would have to leave for Europe but she had to do that if she truly wanted to achieve his goal. If she would come back then he would see her again. It made this time a bit more precious. He was bad at showing it though, even if he tried his best to show her he cared. Luckily for him, his friends weren’t there to judge him on that. He could easily hear them.

“It is quite frequent.” He nodded agreeing with her. He was glad that she didn’t seem to suffer that much with her own family. It would mean less drama in that regard. Hopefully, his wouldn’t cause too much drama should they find out about Matsumi. Sometimes he felt like screaming at them but most of the time, he lost that battle against himself and did nothing which made him feel terribly bad. This wasn’t what a man was supposed to do. He looked down at his pastry for a moment, looking thoughtful. “I know it must be hard to be with me, I am not the best at showing my emotions and I wanted to tell you that I care.” He finally let out, looking up at her. “However, there are things that need to be sorted with my family first…will you wait for me?” he asked her. He had no idea how long it would take him but he was willing to wait for her if she went to Europe and he hoped she would do the same with him.

[KIMURA MATSUMI]

To Matsumi, it was a bit weird to think that lawyers could be considered 'old money'. He was, right? That definitely would explain why there was a divide between them. She could imagine his family coming from a long line of scholars and emperors' advisors, which could explain the status. Still, her family was wealthy. And businesses like theirs were big and influential in Japan. Well, there were many more than her family's, but it was still a big deal. Was she really that bad of a match? What more could his parents want for their son?

"Is that something that you want though?" she asked him. His family business may be his father's law firm, but did Osamu really want to become a lawyer or was he forced into it? She didn't feel like her parents were pushing their kids to take part in the business. Well, maybe a little, but they also had four children, plenty to choose from and offer that role to the one interested while letting the others follow their own path.

She was busy eating her own piece of cake, unaware of just how lost in his thoughts Osamu may be. She startled when he talked. She had to agree that it could be hard to be with him, but it was also not something she wanted to admit out loud. Maybe saying so could have shaken him up into acting a little more but she was also afraid to set some fort of ultimatum. He may well choose to end things altogether after all.

Still, having him say that he cared... It may not be quite the words she wanted to hear but it meant something. He didn't need to say however that she already figured something like that would come out afterwards. His family. How much was his family really the problem and how much was it just him hesitating? She couldn't tell, she may never know even, but he was asking for her to wait for him. "Hmm," she said with a nod after a moment. She felt waiting was what she always did with him and was growing ever closer to it being too much for her, but he was finally opening more to her, and she didn't want to lose what little progress that was. It was not what she dreamed to hear from him, but she would take it for now, and cherish it.

[FUJIWARA OSAMU]

Osamu hated being stuck in the old ways of his family. He tended to think with an open minded, compared to them. He was stuck with so much pressure at home that he didn’t know how to let it out. Sure, he had been able to state his point by going to the pension but it wasn’t always like that. He was raised to do as he said and to follow the path that his family wanted him to. He shrugged when she asked about him wanting to follow his family’s route by becoming a lawyer himself. “I don’t mind it, besides, I have a job secured for when I am out of school.” He said. It wasn’t what truly bugged him, what annoyed him was them trying to decide what was best for him, even when it came for a life partner.

He did feel bad for having her waiting for him for so long, but he didn’t know what to do there. Leaving the house to go to the pension was easy, would he be courageous enough to face his family and tell them that he wanted to be with Matsumi? He didn’t know. They’d like the way she was for sure, but the one thing that would interfere was that they weren’t from similar backgrounds.

He could tell that she wasn’t exactly thrilled with the idea and reached out to her hand. “Please forgive me for putting you through this.” He finally said. There were times where he had trouble being wild, and right now, he wished he truly was to show her he cared but he just was lost with words for now.

[KIMURA MATSUMI]

Matsumi mentally lashed out at herself. She shouldn't stick to the negative what-ifs lurking around them. Osamu invited her, they were not only eating together but he said they should do it more often, he even agreed to her suggestion of letting him pick a place next time. She wondered what he would choose. She bet something calm, a tea shop, a library or something like that. He was probably too shy to invite her to an onsen. Considering their age, she should expect something more trendy but she felt that if he took her to anything more modern than a play it would probably be a suggestion from the guys at the house. Not that she would mind though, as long as she could be with him.

That was it. She should focus on that instead. Their relationship might be confusing right now but they were together, and it had nothing to do with anyone else but them. They would have another date at some point. And she would make him chocolates for Valentine that he would obviously accept. And then she could look forward to a gift at White Day... Ok, he might forget about White Day, but she would give him chocolate that he would eat and say he liked. Yes, she really needed to think about that. And maybe not think too much about the future that was even more confusing and uncertain.

He even reached for her hand, a gesture quite against his usual character. He had to be either quite desperate to lose her or noticed how down she was for a moment. She feared he'd get self-conscious over his hand being on hers. She turned her hand, slowly moving it away to then trace with her fingers against his hand. "You know, I've never expected you to ask me out with a prospect of marriage," she told him. It might not entirely true, in the sense that she certainly daydreamed of it, but she only wanted him to say he liked her, he didn't have to go that far. She let go of his hand and smiled at him. "Most people our age don't think this far ahead anyway," she pointed out. But she supposed a lot of those in their ranks at school did, or were forced to consider this. She shrugged. Besides, even if she stayed here during university, she wouldn't go to the same he would. It was obvious, she didn't have the grades for that. That would leave plenty of opportunities for him to meet someone else, more to his family's standards. No, she shouldn't think about that. She forced herself to smile again. "I just want to enjoy this moment right now." And she took a bite of her cake.

[FUJIWARA OSAMU]

Osamu was making efforts to make sure Matsumi understood that he was indeed interested in her. The guys were right, she shouldn’t have waited for him for so long. He hadn’t been nice. However, with his family in the way he wasn’t ready yet to truly face them. He did once, mostly because he kept everything bottled up until it exploded. He was trying hard to not let that happen when it was concerning Matsumi but he wasn’t the kind of guy who would show his affection for his loved one as easily as Hiroki or even Hideo. He always calculated his moves, and made sure he was a proper young man. That’s what his family expected him to do. It took a lot for him to give out his conditions if they wanted him to follow what they had in mind like becoming a lawyer himself. However, the career path wasn’t what bothered him the most. It was that his family might want to pick the one that was suitable for him that bothered him and that he couldn’t have the friends he wanted either having to pick the right connections and so on. He felt caged and he didn’t manage to get out of it as often as he wanted.

He didn’t think that what he asked for her sounded like marriage and blushed immediately. “Oh I’m sorry, that’s not what I intended to ask.” He said feeling a little embarrassed. “I was implying that we could have a relationship.” He said. Of course, marriage would come later but that didn’t even cross his mind yet.

He nodded agreeing with her and hoped that he made it at least clear that he was interested in being with her. “We should.”

[KIMURA MATSUMI]

Matsumi meant the same but apprently Osamu focused only on the marriage part. At least, it was what she assumed when she blushed an apologized. Had he not added that he meant them having a relationship, she might have feared it meant more than that, but he at least reassured her on that. "That's what I'm saying too," she assured him. "I meant to say our relationship could go past just friends without you having to promise marriage at the end of it." Or was it too much as well? She blushed at the thought. She just thought of those manga and dorama where a man, usually serious like Osamu was, told the woman that he wanted to date her, considering marriage if that worked out well. Okay, maybe it was her hopelessly romantic brain that got the best of her and it wasn't as common as she thought for people of his status. But it came to her mind and now she said it. She could not un-say it.

He wanted to enjoy it too. It might not be much in the grand scheme of things, but he already offered her more than she had been having during the whole time she had been going after him. It was a date. She truly could call it that, unlike everything else where the others were also around.

"Did they say anything about your acquaintances also? I don't suppose they approve much of the others at the share house. Except maybe Yamaguchi-kun..." Which was ironic, because he was probably the worst influence in there. But he was from Ouran. She was the one hoping not to talk of them, but she convinced herself that she wasn't really. She wanted to learn more about his parents. If she truly had him, as he claimed also, then all that was left for her was to convince his parents she was right for him. Having a strategy as to how to meet with them would be good, and for that, just like she did with the chocolate a few minutes ago, she needed information.

[FUJIWARA OSAMU]

Osamu was glad that they seemed mostly on the same page but something was still holding him back to fully committing to Matsumi even just as being her boyfriend. He didn’t want his family to destroy her or to be rude to her in any way. They had their opinions and valued the old ways which to him was a bit outdated. He still wondered why they let him stay at the pension and get out of the household. He couldn’t stand the pressure they were putting on him and he exploded. It wasn’t something you could see regularly. Being there with his other roommates put him more at ease for sure and since the person who owned it was a woman of taste, his family didn’t say too much about it no matter who was staying with him. He nodded at her. “I do not want to keep you waiting for too long. I know it must have been harsh.” He said. He wasn’t stupid, and he wasn’t deaf when his friends were trying to talk some ‘sense’ in him. He believed that Hideo could understand what it was to be pressured by your parents but he had the talent not to give a darn about them which he sort of admired and wished he could do.

“I never meant it to be too cold or anything but I wanted you to know that I’m not blind to the attention you gave to me.” He added. “I am open about us having a relationship but I need to sort some things out first.” Like confronting his parents again, which he dreaded but it might need to be done, eventually.

He smiled a little when she asked about his roommates. “Of course they don’t. They value traditions and the old ways, which isn’t exactly my opinion.” He made sure that she knew. He found it funny when his parents called him a rebel and they had never seen Yoshihiro. They would have their share of rebellions if they had him around.

[KIMURA MATSUMI]

Yes, it had been difficult, and Matsumi appreciated that he was able to recognize it. She wished he did more than simply that and ask her to wait for him. It made her wonder what could be holding him back. It for sure had to do with his family, she could tell as much, but was that all? "You are ot engaged to anyone, are you?" Was that why he was so hesitant, because his parents had already chosen a wife for him? They did just say she was not expecting him to propose to her, she was fine with simply dating, but it was true that she was hoping for something more serious if things went well. In the end, she just wanted to understand what held him back. It would help her have the patience to wait for him, as he asked.

He was saying he was ope to a relationship too, which brought hope back in her heart, something she tried to temper knowing there was still much work, or waiting, to do. Still, it pleased her and it showed on her face, even if she tried to calm her enthusiasm a bit.

The fact he said in almost a nonchalant tone how he didn't expect anyone at home to be to his parents' taste helped calm her enthusiasm. Sure, he also pointed out he did ot share those views, but the ease he said it, as though it made sense. "Neither would I," she added as she thought she figured out. Being friend with the other didn't bother him because they would never have to meet his parents. She would. So... she'd have to stay hidden forever? Or wait for him to convince them she was acceptable? It was frustrating to think she lost from the start because they would not approve of her. But Osamu said he wanted a realtionship with her. Perhaps could they be persuaded, or he started to uderstand it was his life and they didn't have to rule over every aspect of it.