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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Feb 28, 2023 21:51:46 GMT
He could understand rock songs. He didn't always like music when he trained but they certainly had a beat that went well for this. He was just not into hyper aggressive songs. "I get it. B'z made some really good songs. Or L'Arc-en-Ciel." Didn't they use to be referenced a lot in anime and manga too? But he supposed they were a bit old for that now. Still, he could name a few other bands that were just good old classics and even people their age would know, if only because their parents listened to them a lot.
He was glad she didn't think he sounded too aggressive while rapping. Especially since the song was not at all. It was a bit weird to him that she was being so polite. Maybe because Ryoko was very direct, not that it was something he disliked about her, and that the girls at school tended not to talk to him too much. Or he avoided them. He grew to forget which one it was now.
He was also relieved that she didn't feel depressed or anything. He shook his head at her apology. "It's ok. I get the lyrics. I can feel that way too sometimes, like it's tough to fit in to the point of wondering what's even the point." It took him a moment to realise he said that while being dressed in such a way. He raised his hands to protest whatever conclusion this may lead her to. "Not that I'm struggling with how society sees me. I mean, not in that way. I'm absolutely, on hundred percent fine being a man and I'm nothing else." It might be tough to believe currently, but that was certainly one point about himself he did not question. One of the few points even. "It's just... I guess I was trying to look the most opposite of what I am usually." He didn't know how much that made sense but, much like her, he didn't see himself opening up too much.
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Post by IWAMOTO YUI on Mar 4, 2023 20:03:10 GMT
Yui smiled and nodded, agreeing with Kyousuke. She liked the fact that they were getting along quite well. She didn’t mind him dressing as a woman, he was someone interesting in her opinion however, while a lot of people had an open mind, not everyone would accept it. She could tell that at her school, they might not be all too keen on it. She didn’t get why, they were still a person after all, what was the harm behind that? She preferred to shove those thoughts aside and keep the discussion on the bands they liked and listened to.
She grew used to listening to artists in different genres so she wasn’t all too frightened when she heard him rap. Sometimes, a genre could change your voice. Take metal for instance, when people could scream. She never could do that herself and you’d never expect how soft their voices could sound despite doing that.
She couldn’t say that she was very happy with her life but she was content with it. She could deal with the deceptions she had from her family by hanging out with her friends. She didn’t vent to them too much and sometimes it was too much to handle for her but she would rather not sing it out to someone she didn’t know whenever it was to happen. “I agree, we are all searching for our place in the world and it’s not always to find it.” She said. She looked at him as he spoke of himself and nodded, understanding what he was saying there. “I get that, it takes guts to do so too, I respect that.” She said. She didn’t find it odd or hard to believe that he could be a guy, and one into girls. Who was she to judge anyway? “Sometimes, I wish I had enough guts to speak my mind too.” She admitted. “Even just in my clothing style.”
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Adult
20
Years Old
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126 Posts
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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Mar 6, 2023 3:48:32 GMT
There was something weird to talking like this with someone he barely knew and only met a few minutes ago. Kyousuke had not always been all that shy to talking to people but Ouran made him careful. He didn't have quite teh right standing for some of his classmates. His father wanted to recognize his son and give him the best chances available for him, which in this case meant becoming a doctor, but he also expected his son to fit the mold of his new life, something he never fully did. But he couldn't say that to Yui. Even Ryoko knew some of that but probably guessed most of it. He didn't want to sound ungrateful. Having a family was what he wanted the most. And he loved both his father and brother. Shun even grew to accept him within the family, despite what his existence implied when it came to the relationship between his parents. He felt close of his brother. But there was also a divide, and the more he felt it expanding, the more desperate he was about it.
When she talked about one's place in life, it pushed him to talk even faster about how he was not trans, or gay or drag or anything like that. Well, he supposed he was a crossdresser, but he was also very much a man, one who didn't want to become a woman. He found it hard to explain. It was easier with Haruhi, since she was doing something similar herself. She could understand this need at times, even if her reasons were very different from his. "I don't know about guts..." He wondered if she really understood or if she was trying to be understanding. It was already more than what he often got but he still wondered.
He frowned at what she said. He was not the only one opening up more than he should. "I don't know about speaking my mind. If I really was, I wouldn't need to pretend to be something else to do it." He also looked at her, since she talked of her clothes. She might only be referring to the ones he was wearing and how different he claimed it was from himself. "I don't think there is anything wrong with your clothes," he felt the need to point out. If she wanted to rebel, he didn't think doing it with her clothes was the best way to do it. It was the most superficial, which may be why he did that too, when he was a guy, but it was not true rebellion. Not a meaningful one anyway.
The karaoke machine reminded them they should make their choice out of its selection for their next song. He stared at the screen, distracted for a moment. "Is there anything else you'd like to sing?"
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Post by IWAMOTO YUI on Mar 6, 2023 15:24:13 GMT
Yui was aware that she might not give that impression but she could understand what people were going through on different levels. He was trying to be the opposite of what he was, she doubted she could do. He had a point though, if he had guts he would have spoken to the concerned people or things he was avoiding. She didn’t know much about his situation nor did he know about hers but she still felt they could relate in some way. Unlike him though, she didn’t even have the guts to be different just to see how her parents would react. Would they even pay attention to her? Probably, but not in a way she would have liked. A lot of the time, she felt like she was just part of the furniture and it annoyed her greatly. “Though, even if we do speak our mind, sometimes, the people concerned won’t listen to us.” She said to Kyousuke, finding it strange yet comforting to be talking of deeper feelings with a stranger. Sometimes, it was better to do that with someone who didn’t already have an opinion of yourself. She wondered if he felt the same as she had the feeling he didn’t say those things to just anyone he met.
She couldn’t help but laugh a bit as he talked about her clothes. “Thanks, I take it as a compliment.” She said smiling. “I know I shouldn’t complain and that I have more than what the average person has and it’s probably stupid and needy to feel that way but I’d like my family to acknowledge me for once.” She admitted to him, with a slight shrug.
She nodded when he asked if she’d like to sing something else. “Oh yes, I will try to pick a song that won’t worry you.” She added with a wider smile. She just didn’t want to sound like someone whiney or needy. She didn’t say those things to her friends. Makiko was the only one who had a bit of an idea of what she was going through with her family and it often weighed on her.
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Adult
20
Years Old
Male
126 Posts
Heterosexual
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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Mar 16, 2023 20:34:44 GMT
Kyousuke changed a lot, in certain aspects of his life. He toughened up, he decided to go for a more delinquent look, something that he was certain a lot of kids who had known him in elementary school or even kindergarten never would have believed. On certain things, he was more outspoken, on others, he was more private. He didn't always knew if those changes were the natural result of growing up or if it was just him trying to adapt to the world around him. It was why he was dressed that way in front of Yui. It was the only way he found to be able to express sides of him he wasn't sure to still be allowed to show.
He understood what she meant by that. It spoke to him, immediately sending him images of his father. "Yes. Or they think it is just a phase we'll grow out of." Kyousuke doubted he would mind no longer having to dress like this. He didn't mind it, but he was aware it was just another costume, that it was not exactly who he was, much like what he looked like while at school or whenever his father invited other doctors and the like. He didn't know what she was going through herself to be saying that. She could have said it only to be nice to him.
"That is," he assured in regards to her clothes. It looked rather simple but also stylish. Nothing gaudy. "I like that kind of clothes. I mean, on women." He might have been a little more colourful himself right now but that didn't change what he said. When it came of woman fashion, for women that is, he liked it simple, when it didn't try to show off too much, preferably in light colors. He loved the softness of such a look.
He could understand her woe. He bet had he complained he too would have a lot of people telling him he was whining while being full, but having privileges didn't mean you couldn't also have troubles."That must be a current thing at Ouran, no? With people there doing for the most part what their parents told them to without a say in the word. You either do what you're told and you're ignored or you don't and you're scolded. Although I doubt many of them would admit it out right." Weren't they supposed to be the best of what society could achieve? Still, wasn't it cruel to these kids to be deprived of recognition, let alone love, until they finally achieved that which their parents and society expected of them?
"Oh, hmm, I wasn't too worried..." It was more that he wasn't sure how to respond if that was a real cry for help. At least she was smiling again so maybe he could expect a bright poppy song next. He grabbed the beer he ordered for himself. She told him she didn't need anything right now so he didn't get her one. He needed it right now though, if only to chase away the awkwardness.
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Post by IWAMOTO YUI on May 31, 2023 22:59:31 GMT
Yui on the other hand, couldn’t say that she changed a lot. She wished to change, but she didn’t know what to do. She was tied; she wanted to be in her family's favor even if they ignored her. They paid attention to the heir of her family, she just seemed to be taking up space and felt like they didn’t need her. Sometimes, she even felt bad for feeling that way, like a weight. Her friend had to remind her countless times that she shouldn’t feel that way and it wasn’t right. She never really spoke of that to anyone and didn’t feel like she could do the same to Kyousuke here. Though it could be nice to be able to spill her real feelings but she just couldn’t. She had to be pleasant and she thought he could be a potential friend; one who could wear makeup better than some girls she knew! Yui smiled, reassured that he appreciated the way she looked. She wasn’t hitting on him or anything of the like. She just felt better getting someone’s approval. She might not even do it on purpose to get reassured of her various worries. It only came out naturally. “I never liked getting too much attention and I think it suits me the best.” She said warmly. She was confident with her clothing style. She gave it a thought and nodded her head slowly agreeing with him when he mentioned the students at Ouran. “Definitely, people don’t know we have our share of troubles too. If only we could get in each other’s shoes to understand the person it would make life easier and cause less trouble too.” She said more in a thoughtful way. She didn’t want to shower him with her worries right now as they were only getting to know each other and she didn’t want to sound like a whiner. She eyed him for a moment as she scrolled through the songs and opted for a more preppy one that still had rock vibes, preferring that genre anyway. It would definitely lighten up the mood at least.
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Adult
20
Years Old
Male
126 Posts
Heterosexual
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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Jun 24, 2023 23:57:44 GMT
Karaoke didn't feel like the best place to unload a lot of issues, let alone when doing it with strangers. Kyousuke barely picked on the fact they were more or less saying the same thing, or at least that they could understand one another. Someone else might have seen in it an opening to flirt with her but Kyousuke didn't think of it. In part because he was wearing a dress, a wig and heaving meakup right now!
He couldn't be the only one at Ouran who was not sure they were going the right path for them. But was it also Yui's case? Well, it wasn't like he said he was from Ouran, right? For a moment, he doubted himself and stared at her, as though she would have the answer written on her face.
"I wouldn't bother being like this if I was not looking for some attention, but I prefer to stay classy." Was it true though? Well, he definitely kept a more feminine look and didn't try to go for anything too dramatic, but was he really looking for attention? In a sense, but he supposed his actions trying to hide from her earlier could suggest something else. "It's just liberating. Like it's okay to say whatever I want, it's not really me. Well, it is me..." He was not delusional, he understood that. And he was now rambling a bit. It was why he liked being around people but not necessarily talk too much. His air-headedness would show up eventually.
At least he thought that, when bringing the school again, he played it well enough to not make it too obvious he went there too. "Everyone has worries yet they don't seem to understand it for others." He was thinking of his mother who struggle to raise him despite his peculiar upbringing, or Ryoko taking care of her son on her own. He might value their worries more than that of some Ouran privileged student whining over nonsensical things.
He let her do her song which was, as she said, happier in tone than her previous one. "Maybe we should keep up with the happy songs," he said as he looked at the catalogue on songs. He found one from a girls' band. It used to be pretty popular five or so years ago. Kyousuke seemed to remember how he found one of the girls really cute, although he could barely remember what she looked like now. Well, if they played the video along the lyrics, he might be able to spot her and see if his tastes had changed since.
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Post by IWAMOTO YUI on Jun 25, 2023 0:30:20 GMT
Yui didn’t think that Kyousuke was trying to hit on her or being nice with ulterior motives. She thought he was a genuinely nice person and she appreciated his company. It might be an odd way to meet someone but she didn’t mind, in fact, she wondered if she could count him as a friend and if they would meet again in the Karaoke. She wouldn’t mind catching up with him on various occasions if it was their spot! She did notice him staring at her for some reason she did not know, but she didn’t mind. She didn’t know he was going through a lot of questioning regarding her and knowing his identity.
She didn’t think his look was dramatic or out of taste. She could understand, he was like a different person, a character should she say? “I get that, it must feel nice to be able to do that though.” She didn’t know if she would have the guts, then again, no one would know who she was. She would definitely have to ask for his makeup tricks. Speaking of which. “You’d have to teach me how you wear your makeup.” She said with a smile, telling him he had skills.
“That is true, people don’t take time to put themselves in others’ shoes before judging.” She had always been careful, or at least tried her best. She didn’t think she was one of the most horrible people who came from Ouran, right?
She laughed a bit and nodded agreeing with him. “We can, I don’t mind.” She didn’t want to worry him either. It wasn’t her goal there.
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Adult
20
Years Old
Male
126 Posts
Heterosexual
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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Jun 25, 2023 1:13:32 GMT
It was a bit odd to meet someone who did not react in any way about his attire. There have been Haruhi too, but she said her father did the same, and so did she, in a way, so it made sense that it was not as weird to her. But was it really that normal? It did save him some explaining though, which was a relief for Kyousuke, although he might have a friend reminding him that it might not be as common as he made it sound to be later on.
"Well..." he trailed off. Sure, it was nice, but wouldn't it be best to simply be himself? It was not like he was hoping to have a career as a crossdresser or anything like that. He may be questioning the path he was on but that definitely was not the one he expected to take instead. He leaned in after she mentioned makeup. "Eh? You don't seem to be doing anything bad with yours," he argued. Her seemed a little more neutral than his, that was about it. But she had no reason to go bold if she didn't feel like it. Kyousuke simply thought that if he had to dress up and change who he was entirely already, he might as well go for something like this in terms of hair and makeup. Well, wig and makeup.
Once he picked the song, he handed her an extra microphone so they could sing it together. It would be weird to sing a girl's band's song all by himself, next to a girl no less. Sure, if someone were to enter, they may think they were two girls, provided they didn't hear him sing, but she knew the truth and it was embarrassing. Together however, that was just a regular karaoke night with two people singing what was a very popular song when they were teenagers.
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Post by IWAMOTO YUI on Sept 17, 2023 14:03:22 GMT
Sure, seeing Kyousuke dressed like that wasn’t a daily thing to see but Yui wasn’t against it either. What harm did it do to people? None and it was nobody’s business if he wanted to dress that way. She tended to be more accepting of others than certain people in her social rank, she knew that. She could have been judgmental and mean, but with the jobs her parents had, it wasn’t new for her to see eccentric people.
She looked at him in a curious way when he seemed to trail off. Was it exactly what he wanted? Or did he do that on purpose over something? She might never know but she felt like it was too much of a personal question to ask him, especially after the first meeting. She smiled when he complimented her makeup though. “Sure it’s not bad but yours is really good too!” She said lightly.
She was in a better mood when he picked a song that she could sing along with him. It was fun. She sang along with him, showing him that she enjoyed doing so and even being more open in her gestures. She really liked singing as a hobby but she didn’t want to make a living out of it. Anyways, she didn’t think she was that talented even if some might argue against it.
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Adult
20
Years Old
Male
126 Posts
Heterosexual
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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Sept 24, 2023 15:56:05 GMT
She was complimenting him on the makeup he put on. He was starting to be a tad embarrassed about it. Flattered too, but also embarrassed. He chuckled to try to chase this feeling away. "Well, I guess I just paid attention to people's makeup and tried things. But there's nothing wrong in going with a more neutral style. I just figure that if I'm to look like this, I might as well go all out." Then again, it was not intense. But he wasn't scared of colors and trying things. "Well, maybe not "all out" exactly..." He didn't want to look like a caricature either. He was not trying to do a mockery of a woman here. He was not performing either.
For a moment, he remembered that he once heard about those geisha-like type of entertainers. They were actually men, only very feminine-looking ones. He doubted he could quite fit that, not with his build, but he wondered if they were not wearing neutral makeup. He wondered if he should try. Then relaized the type of clothes he normally wore when crossdressing and figured it would be better with what he was wearing right now. He was not in the mood of wearing a woman's kimono to justify going for that style.
At least Kyousuke could also sing on higher, less aggressive notes than when he rapped. He still didn't think it was very feminine, especially with another woman singing along with him, but it created less of a clash than if he had a much deeper voice. She knew the song and seemed to have fun too. "I'll get another drink, do you want something too?" he asked, ready to get her something. He did offered her that earlier and she declined, but it was when she joined him. At least he too was feeling more at ease around her, despite his disguise.
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Post by IWAMOTO YUI on Jan 21, 2024 14:31:26 GMT
Yui could understand where Kyousuke was going from. You might as well go full in if you were accepting that part of yourself. “You have the guts to do that.” She stated. She was no professional makeup artist herself but she thought that he was talented for doing that by himself and he could certainly look like a girl. Sure, one couldn’t change the body you were born with unless you were going to a surgery but she doubted that he was willing to go that far to look like a woman. He wasn’t a trans. “Oh don’t worry, I have seen a lot of artists and you could be considered like one, they sometimes pull that kind of stunt and no one questions them.” She said. It was true, she had seen her parents working for them and they intended her to get a job as an agent or even a talent seeker. It wasn’t as prestigious as her brother’s job but she supposed it was better than nothing.
It started strangely, but she found out that it was really fun to be around him and decided that it wouldn’t hurt to stay a bit longer. She didn’t think he would try to make a move on her either. They had a blast singing a song together and she didn’t feel too awkward showing it off to a stranger that she just met. However, she was willing to make him a friend, let alone a karaoke friend if he’d agree to it.
“Yes, this time I think I will.” She said smiling.
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Adult
20
Years Old
Male
126 Posts
Heterosexual
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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Jan 21, 2024 14:54:23 GMT
Having the guts? There were probably a few people who'd call him gutsy. Almost a yankee to a point, or at least from Ouran standard. He bet Ryoko would laugh at the idea of Kyousuke being any of that. But the others didn't know him too well. They just knew he loved boxing, had spiky dyed hair and could look a bit menacing if you annoyed him. Well, Yui wouldn't know that either, since it was all she had seen of him. He didn't know if that look was gutsy. Maybe in the sense that not a lot of people would dare go out like this, but considering the reasons why he dressed up that way, he wasn't sure it applied to him. "Not sure about that..." he mumbled.
Was she comparing him to an artist? "Yeah, but they're doing a performance. I'm..." He didn't finish his thought. He was not quite ready to explain why he was dressing up this way to someone he barely knew. Someone from his school no less, who could start some rumours about him afterwards. She said she was not like that and she looked nice, but that girl who gave him chocolate that first year he went to Ouran looked nice too, until he asked her out thinking she liked him and she laughed to his face.
He nodded, calming down as she agreed to a drink. He called to have some brought in, asking her what she wanted. Normally he would go for a beer but he suddenly felt like maybe tea or something else of the like would be better. "You often go to karaoke alone like that?" He said as they waited for their drinks and looked at what other song they could sing, or at laest play in the background.
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Post by IWAMOTO YUI on Jan 28, 2024 1:05:28 GMT
Yui wouldn’t say that Kyousuke was a yankee, she would consider him to be in the rebel category but she thought that one could do whatever they wanted as long as it didn’t hurt others’ feelings. She preferred to maintain a good balance of positivity around herself. She’s had enough negatives in her life that she wanted to keep a good balance among her friendships. To her, he was someone who had guts, to dress like that in public without worrying about what others might think. She was curious as to why he didn’t look so sure of himself all of a sudden. He seemed to have lost his confidence but she didn’t say anything about it, letting him say what he had to say.
“So what? Even if you’re not doing a performance you’re still doing art, in a way.” She said, thinking of it as well. The people who were doing this weren’t quite different than the people performing on the scene. She started to understand a bit that it might be a way to hide himself but she felt like they did not know each other well enough to start that kind of conversation.
Yui asked for something light and she was happy to spend some time with good company. She hoped that he would come back so they could catch up on more discussions in the future. “Yeah, I prefer singing on my own; I find it embarrassing when I sing in front of people. I guess it’s not as bad to sing in front of a stranger but I wouldn’t do that in front of a crowd either.” Her voice was fine, but she didn’t intend to become an artist. Even if it might get the attention of her parents a little.
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Adult
20
Years Old
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126 Posts
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With different people I’m with, I change into one of my many me’s and use that
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Post by SHISHIDO KYOUSUKE on Feb 4, 2024 18:37:31 GMT
Doing art? He never tought about that. His mother might have tried to encourage him in that route if that made him happy, or at least to view things from an artistic point if that helped him. But he was not living with his mother anymore and the thought of his father's opinion about this made him laugh. "I'm not sure art is what's expected of me." Medicine was far too logical to add art into it. Unless one chose to claim it was an art to be a skilled surgeon. Somehow, he doubted his father was of that mind.
"I would have been way more embarrassed to sing in front of strangers than people I know," Kyousuke pointed out. At least if he was tone deaf around Ryoko, he could laugh it off, or push it further. "You weren't bad enough to be embarrassed to do it." Plus, weren't you likely to see all together when in groups? Well, it wasn't like he did it often either so he wouldn't know. He didn't go to karaoke that often, in groups or alone. It was a real coincidence that he chose to do that tonight.
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